If you think negatively of a certain trait you have…

…and it’s been around for a while in society, ask why natural selection didn’t extinguish it.

It seems like selfishness maybe an entirely negative trait. I had a few friends who I used to consider selfish when I was younger, but later realized there is actually a social benefit at times to it.

Ever go out with a bunch of easy-going people? “Where should we go to eat?” is a common refrain.

“I don’t care.”

“I’m good with whatever.”

“Whatever anyone wants is fine by me.”

That’s great that everyone is in agreement, but who is actually going to decide?

One guy says, “We’ll go to my favorite pizza place.”

In this situation, if there is one and only one person with a recommendation, no one seems selfish. It’s when there are multiple of these types in the group, and neither wants to budge, then the selfishness seems more apparent.

The point is, these traits are situational. If you are thinking negatively about certain traits you have, it’s more likely that you’re not putting yourself in the right situations for them to be assets. Take some time to think through what those situations might be and use them to make yourself the best possible version.